This week I had the opportunity to deal with some people who were choosing to be difficult. They seemed to have decided that the plans of the group did not matter as much as the things they wanted to do. As their leader for the week, that was incredibly frustrating. My toddlers were doing a better job of following directions and cooperating than these people. So I had to deal with that.
I tried a number of tactics, to insight cooperation. Do you know what worked? Dealing with it straight up, confronting the facts as they were - This is how you ought to behave and this is why... if you do not behave this way, this is what will happen.
I'm not saying that this made things 100% better, but at least tolerable.
One evening, as I was praying about this particular group who was making poor choices, I asked God what he would do in my situation. Have you ever done that and not liked the answer? Do you know what god told me? "I would say Come and follow me and I will make you fishers of men." That is not what I wanted to hear. God wanted me to invite these people to follow him.
See, I know God loves everyone, and I WANT these people to know him - but I want to see a difference RIGHT NOW. I wanted God to say something like "Say these magic words and things will change".
I guess it's a good thing I'm not God.
How do you deal with difficult people?
The most difficult person I have to deal with, on a regular basis, is my boyfriend's childrens' mother. Put plainly, she's a bully. She believes that she has the right to yell and scream at anyone and everyone. Even the childrens' grandmother!! So, I dealt with her like I deal with people that I have encountered, thus far, that are difficult...I simple explained that although I understand that they're upset (angry, frustrated, whatever the case may be), and that it does NOT give that person the right to yell at me and that I simply refuse to listen to it and if they continue, they WILL be hung up on! I've not had to do this in a face-to-face situation, yet. I've had to do this at work a few times as well (and was TOTALLY backed up by the HR head). LOL
ReplyDeleteIt's funny how when you assert that you will give respect only when it is given to you, it seems to be given quickly, although that goes hand-in-hand with a good dose of empathy.
I will admit that children are a little different, as they don't have the life experience that adults do. So, my advice seems to be a little on the 'moot point' side. LOL
If you figure out how to deal with disrespectful, or difficult little people...ya know, the mid-sized ones...let me know. I could surely use some pointers!!!
Well, these people children - but they are upper high school aged children.
ReplyDelete