Bedtime Bootcamp

Sleep has ALWAYS been an issue for Manasseh, and ever since he figured out he could climb out of the crib it has also been a problem for Cassius.  Azariah still has no problem with sleep (praise God).  I decided a couple of weeks ago that I was going to go Supernanny on them.  I was going to hold Bedtime Bootcamp!

The first night was one that daddy was "home" (at camp).  I put the boys in their room with a book and a prayer at 8pm.  I closed the door and walked downstairs.  I was surprised at how long it was before one dared to come out - probably a whole 15 minutes.  We gently took them back to bed.

Before long they were jumping from bed to bed in their room.  By 9, Manasseh had come downstairs to tell me he had gotten hurt - how?  He was trying to be a super hero.  At 10:00 they were still restless, I checked in on them to see the boys both on top of their little dresser.  Oi

I wanted to give in and lay down with them until they fell asleep, I really did.  I couldn't do it though, I had to be tough, this was Bootcamp.

11:30 rolled around and they were just getting more wired.  They had some great game of imagination going on. I was tired.  I gave in and laid down with each of them until they fell asleep.

By midnight, they were out.

The next night was 4th of July.  I decided that even though I REALLY wanted to let them stay up and watch fireworks, I needed to be consistent.  It worked out very much the same as the night before.

July 5th was SUPER SUPER hot.  We have 1 air conditioner in our little cottage, it's upstairs and gets the job of trying to cool the whole place.  It was really hot.  I decided the boys and I were going to head to our regular house early, so we loaded the van and went home - We had to run errands anyway.  They fell asleep on the way home, we were lucky.

Last night I laid down with my sleepy head - yep, I gave in and laid down with them - bedtime was done in half an hour.

Tonight? I'm not even pretending bootcamp will work while we're living in such a state of fluctuation.

Real Responsibilities

Last week one day my sister called me to tell me about all of the great deals she had gotten at a certain store's dollar area.  I'm a sucker for clearance and her store had a ton of half price goodies.  So - We took a detour from my plan to do a bit of shopping at a different store, and checked out the dollar bins.

I didn't find exactly the same great deals at our store, but one find that my boys were particularly excited about was small handheld brooms with dustpans.  It's hard to beat $0.50 for that set (unless of course you are able to hold out for the 75% off mark down... but I didn't have time for that).  I generously let each of my big boys pick out their own broom and dustpan set.

Guess what Manasseh did when we got home.  You got it, he swept the "yucky floor."  He begged to do it.


It doesn't end there though.  See, in all of my "spare" time (okay I don't even pretend to have much of that these days) - I have been doing bits of reading about responsibility.  I've been reading about the demise of our society, the lack of responsibility in our youth, the way other children in other cultures are taught from the start how to behave and be a fruitful part of their society.  I've even observed it in the kids on campus this summer - both the campers and the help (sorry if you are one of those).

Young people don't know how to do things.  I recognize that I don't do "things" as well as some of the older people around the campus - they know how to fix what is broken.  I grew up in a throw away world.  Everything is replaceable, it's easier to throw it out and get a new one (whatever it was). I grew up in a fast paced world, I'm busy and should not need to take the time to do it well.  I don't even think I do dishes as well as some of the people around me.

"Ooooh, Chores?!"

I remember doing "chores" as a kid - mostly.  I mean, we didn't get PAID to do them, they were just expected, and sometimes I balked about it.  Sometimes, when I had to clean my room, I crawled under my bed and took a nap - true story.  In light of my observations about the world around me, and my reading about other people's observations, I've decided that I am absolutely going to change the way I'm living.

Disclaimer: This does not mean my house will be 100% clean all of the time.

I will not let my children be an excuse for having a dirty house - instead, I will expect them to take part in caring for the house.  In fact, I know it is best for our children to have responsibilities.  Being responsible for things helps you take ownership, it gives you a sense of belonging, it makes  you feel needed and important.  I could go on about the advantages of learning to be responsibility.

"I have to what?!"

Here are some actual steps that I have already taken since my decision last week that the boys WILL be helping to take care of the house:
- Each morning I ask my big boys to put their blankets on their beds.  I don't expect them to MAKE their beds yet, I'm just working on getting them into the habit of being responsible in that area.
- Each night before bed, the boys put all of their toys away - there's no need for the mama to stress about jobs the kids can take part in, right?
- On Tuesday, before we went on an overnight trip, Manasseh packed everyone's clothes.  Okay - so his packing was really just putting the pile of dirty clothes into a laundry basket, which he took into the bathroom himself and even chose to drag back out on his own.
- Manasseh is already expected to dress himself every day, but sometimes he is lazy about it - since my change of habit, he must dress himself, and Cassius is working harder at learning to dress himself.
- The boys already put their own dishes in the sink after each meal.
- They are also expected to help put trash in the can.

We will continue to work on adding responsibility, they are now 2.5 and 4 and can do increasingly more to help out around the house.  Real responsibility is part of being in a family.  It is not a choice, it's a necessity. They are not even going to earn money for doing it. You know what?  They don't even complain (yet).

A kick start on the potty

We've been working on learning to potty with Cassius since he was able to sit.  He gets the concept, and thinks he wants to wear underwear, but he is a busy 2 year old and does not like to sit for long enough to go.  We're working on it, still.  I honestly think that if I were able to stay home with the boys all of the time, he would be going with no trouble.  As I've said, I'm more busy than I intend to be.

So this week I learned a great technique for kick starting the potty reflex.  Cassius had to give a urine sample at the doctor's office - do you know how they do that on children who don't use the toilet regularly?  They use a bag.  

I knew INSTANTLY when Cassius needed to go.  In fact, even after he was done with this "test", he stayed dry the rest of the day and TOLD us when he needed to go.

So this morning, we started the day in underwear - and he did well... for a while - I got distracted with another task and didn't send him in time - then we had an emergency on campus and I kept him in a diaper the rest of the day.  We'll start again tomorrow.

Journaling for Better Behaviors

I confess.  My life is messy.  I have a hard time with consistent discipline - for myself, and my boys.  When I say "discipline", I don't mean punishment or consequence.  I mean - sometimes it's hard to remember to get everyone's teeth brushed before we run out the door - sometimes I even forget to give Manasseh his arthritis medicine!  That's not good.  I also forget to read my Bible, spend time in prayer, eat well, and so forth.

They're all on the move all the time - so much fun, and a lot of work.

My kids are complicated sometimes.  My job is complicated sometimes.  Heck, life is difficult.

I've been concerned for a little while that Cassius is developing another food allergy - and said many times that I need to keep track of what he's eating and how his body responds.  But... that takes work and I'm good at forgetting.

I'm working on better behaviors that will improve the overall health of my family. Yesterday I bought 4 notebooks from Walmart (school sale time, college ruled notebooks $0.17 this week).  I got a notebook for each child, and one for myself.  I don't figure Mr. Crum wants me to monitor his foods and activities.

So here's my commitment:

Starting today I will be tracking everything that the boys and I eat.  All for different reasons - myself for diabetes & weight management, Manasseh for arthritis symptoms, Cassius for allergies, Azariah for weight gain!  I'll also be tracking Manasseh's swollen joint, Cash's episodes of blank staring, Azariah's diaper changes.  AND - the big thing for me: my time with God.  Yep.  I'll be journaling in my notebook as I work to improve myself.

Here's to a healthier family!  My life will still be messy.  I mean - I'm a "stay at home" mom that lives at work with 3 boys 4 and under.  That's a lot of busy-ness.  But we can be healthy while we learn together how to live cleaner, healthier, fuller lives!

A Quick Update on Cassius

If you've been around for a while, you may recall that this little guy had a rough start.  We learned when he was newborn that he'd had a stroke before he arrived and that he had some significant brain damage.  The doctors indicated that movements requiring balance (sitting, crawling, walking...) would be extremely difficult for him, if he could figure them out at all.  At 11 days old he was referred to First Steps for therapy - he was delayed in some of his early skills, now at 2.5 years (and 4 days) old, he has defied every prediction they made for him.  God is good.

About a month ago I recognized some behaviors that looked like they might indicate he is having seizures - not obvious things like he's laying on the floor with convulsions - blank stares for long periods.  These have been increasing and with my very active little boy, I take notice of those episodes.  


We were able to get an appointment with his neurologist very (VERY) quickly.  I was amazed at how well they got us in.  Yesterday morning we talked with her for a while.  She agrees he is certainly at risk for seizures, but she can't be sure if that's what they are, without having one recorded on an EEG.  


In the near future we'll be taking this guy in for another EEG to get a "baseline" - for now she wants us just to monitor him.  If it becomes more frequent she'll order a longer test that will make it clear whether these episodes are seizures.


For now, friends, please say some prayers for this mama and her sweet boy.

Invasion of the Strangers

As I sit on my couch with my feet propped neatly on my coffee table and a bowl of nachoes to my side.  I smell kerosene.  Yep, like the stuff you burn in an oil lamp.  Why?  "Maybe it was a stranger".  (Or maybe it was a curious 4 year old).

Yes, friends, strangers seem to have invaded our household.  They cause all sorts of mischief and try to make it look like my sweet, innocent boys are at fault.  Oh, the baby is part of the scheming too.
"Why is there baby food on your bed?"
"Um, Maybe it was Azariah".
"I don't think that's how it got there."
"Um, maybe you were feeding him on my bed."
(I promise, I have fed him on the bed - but only "mama milk", never baby food).
"I don't feed him upstairs."
"Or, maybe it was Cassius".

He probably IS plotting against his brothers.

Have I mentioned that my sweet Manasseh turned 4 yesterday?  Some time recently, in the process of getting ready to be 4, he figured out that he does not like to get in trouble.  He also figured out that if he blames someone else, maybe he won't get in trouble.

We value truth.  We are careful to practice teaching our children the truth.  Maybe I'm a little overboard sometimes- they know that Santa isn't a jolly fat man bringing them presents, we are very careful about teasing them with false information (you know, things that parents tell their kids - if you don't eat your spinach you'll never get taller... silly things we use to encourage our children to behave the way we want them to... that aren't really fully truth).  I want my boys to be full grounded in truth as they grow.  We don't shun imagination, in fact - we encourage it.  A box can be a pirate ship (yes, pirates are real and they really steal things and God doesn't like stealing).  We love to pretend to be different things, but I want to make sure my kids know what is real and what is not.  We want to be sure that they recognize there IS a difference between truth and untruth, and that there IS absolute truth.

So, how do we deal with the strangers that keep breaking into our home to make my honest little boys look like criminals?

Calmly.  With expectations up front.  Promise of a better consequence for telling the truth.  Explanation about "why".  (Why we tell the truth, why the problem IS a problem, etc).

So tonight's conversation about the kerosene lamp.  (By the way I realize that I am at fault for leaving the lamp on the end table with full knowledge that my boys have a hard time staying off the arms of the couch once in a while).
Me: Manasseh, what happened to the lamp?

Nas: Um, Maybe it was strangers that did knock it over.

Me: Manasseh, what happened to the lamp?

Nas: Um, Maybe it was Cassius.

Me: Manasseh, what happened to the lamp? (See, I knew he knew what happened, whether it had been him or not he could tell me the truth about what happened).

Nas: I don't know.

Me: Manasseh, I expect you to tell me the truth.  When you tell the truth you don't get in as much trouble and you feel better after you tell the truth.

Nas: It was me that did knock it over.

Me:  Thank you.  I proceeded to clean up the spilled oil and moved the lamp to a safer place while explaining that it is not safe to play with the oil lamp.

Nas: Why it not safe?

He stood in front of me and looked me in the eyes to talk about oil lamp safety.  I could have been angry, but honestly a good part of the problem was the fact that I left the lamp where the kids could knock it over.  I could have been upset about the lie (we're dealing with them somewhat regularly right now and have been talking about why God likes truth).  I don't want him to fear me, but learn to come to me with his needs and problems.

As I think about the strangers invading my house, I am reminded of my own relationship with God.  Sometimes I want to hide things.  I know, it's sillier than my son hiding the fact that he knocked over the lamp.  Still, I shove things deep inside and ignore them until the smell gets so big that EVERYONE notices.  Much like the smell of the kerosene told me there was a problem.

I don't want that.

God, help me be clean and holy.  Bring truth to my lips.  Help me share your truth with those around me.

For the lover of Blue Glass

My mother loves cobalt blue glass everything.  She's got a beautiful collection of blue glass pieces in her home that are always a treat to look at.  It's amazing the things one can find made from blue glass!  (imagine a picture of her kitchen here.... if only I had a recent one!)

My parents also enjoy watching birds.  In fact, for a while they had a webcam set up to observe a next of robins on their front porch.  It was fascinating.

Last month we had the opportunity to try out a Perky Pets Hummingbird Feeder.  I've said before that Perky Pet feeders are absolutely my favorite.  They are excellent quality that will last for a lifetime.  I love sharing them with friends and family.  We even chose to bring one of our feeders to camp this summer.

Monkey picked out the Antique Cobalt Bottle Blue Hummingbird Feeder.  It is beautiful.  It made his Nana happy when she received it as a late mother's day gift!

Well done, Perky Pets!