Do you ever feel O.U.T.?
I'm feeling it now:
It's been a fight for me to get back into the swing of things since baby came along. Can you believe he'll be 3 weeks old tomorrow? I find it hard to wrap my mind around.
I know, I shouldn't expect to be able to immediately jump back into things like a field worker in a 3rd world country. I'm not going to give birth, toss the baby on my back, and keep going. I feel, in some ways, like I should though. Truthfully I started to feel O.U.T. a month or so before he arrived.
Now, as I try to jump back into the swing of family life, part time work, and keeping up with the home - I feel defeated! (again, still.. whatever you want to call it). I'm getting there, I know it's going to take time. My sister likes to remind me, "if you had a "regular" job, you wouldn't even be allowed to go back to work until you got it cleared from the doctor." I'm glad not to have a "regular" job.
I LOVE my work. I am able to help little guys and girls begin to learn about faith. I get to be a support to their families. I get to do fun things like family movie and game night, or Christmas programs! I also have some great volunteers that make the ministry happen. They are the ones that keep things going. What a blessing.
All that said - I am overwhelmed, unmotivated, and tired. Mind you, it's not the kind of tired that comes from not sleeping - I'm still usually getting my mid-day nap with the Monkey. It's just the tired that comes from a body trying to figure out how to regain strength after being cut in two, and having an 11.5 pound growth removed!
I decided that instead of beating myself up over having a hard time jumping back into things, I am going to spend time tomorrow in prayer for my family, my work, myself.
We'll get back to "normal" before long.