Tuesday, November 1, 2011


Do you ever feel O.U.T.?

I'm feeling it now:

It's been a fight for me to get back into the swing of things since baby came along.  Can you believe he'll be 3 weeks old tomorrow?  I find it hard to wrap my mind around.

I know, I shouldn't expect to be able to immediately jump back into things like a field worker in a 3rd world country.  I'm not going to give birth, toss the baby on my back, and keep going.  I feel, in some ways, like I should though.  Truthfully I started to feel O.U.T. a month or so before he arrived.

Now, as I try to jump back into the swing of family life, part time work, and keeping up with the home - I feel defeated! (again, still.. whatever you want to call it).  I'm getting there, I know it's going to take time.  My sister likes to remind me, "if you had a "regular" job, you wouldn't even be allowed to go back to work until you got it cleared from the doctor."  I'm glad not to have a "regular" job.

I LOVE my work.  I am able to help little guys and girls begin to learn about faith.  I get to be a support to their families.  I get to do fun things like family movie and game night, or Christmas programs!  I also have some great volunteers that make the ministry happen.  They are the ones that keep things going.  What a blessing.

All that said - I am overwhelmed, unmotivated, and tired.  Mind you, it's not the kind of tired that comes from not sleeping - I'm still usually getting my mid-day nap with the Monkey.  It's just the tired that comes from a body trying to figure out how to regain strength after being cut in two, and having an 11.5 pound growth removed!  

I decided that instead of beating myself up over having a hard time jumping back into things, I am going to spend time tomorrow in prayer for my family, my work, myself.

We'll get back to "normal" before long.


  1. You WILL get back to "normal." Do make sure you are getting good nutrition and hydration--that will go a long way toward helping with the healing from childbirth. In some cultures they don't strap the baby on their backs and return to the fields immediately. Im some, the mother and baby stay inside and are waited on hand and foot for 40 days--I always thought that was a good idea!

  2. Thank you Beth. I totally agree, I'd love to be waited on for 40 days... or at least, it sounds like a good idea, I think I'd struggle with that too thoughT

  3. If it's possible, why don't you take a few days to a week and just focus on yourself and your family. Do the minimum you can on cleaning. Plan lots and lots of fun projects with the kids. Cook dinner with them. Make yummy desserts. Spend time just watching Mr. Newbie nursing. Be amazed at how he sees this strange world. Curl up with hubby and watch a stupid, mindless TV show and make fun of it after the kids have gone to bed.

    You're one busy lady and maybe just a little "vacation" from responsibility and aiming to have fun might be all you need to feel the motivation come rushing back?

    (Oh, and I like Beth's idea. Mine is kind of a modern USA version of that!)

  4. Thanks Alicia. I have been working on that a little this week. I even had Mr. Crum take the van a couple of days so I had to stay home and "relax" a little.